I am THAT and this.

It is easy for the mind to imagine that self realization is a sort of ultimate understanding. A paradise gained which, once found provides a perfect emotional experience - like being forever blissful. There are several easily made mistakes here and one is the desire for bliss as an escape from daily life. In the world of duality we experience a wide range of emotion from depression to elation. For many people who are unhappy in their daily lives the idea of bliss is very appealing. But bliss is just a pendulum swing away from misery.

Life is ever changing and a constant expression of changing emotions on a subtle and not so subtle level. I'm not talking about the mental illness of manic depression, I'm talking about moments of flatness and moments of bubbly joy just erupting for no apparent reason. On the other hand there could be a reason, but always changing. If we are alive then everything will change.

Life is change and change is life.

To try to stop this natural tapestry is a sort of emotional suicide and a wish for permanent bliss is really no better.

Let all of life continue to cycle, and not just the emotions. Let happen what will and observe everything. Opposites come and go. Not trying to control it is a revelation. Opposites aren't really opposite but are the other aspect and another part of the same.

It's easy to imagine that self realization lifts you to a 'higher' plain, one of increased perfection or even a perfect state. Perfection presents a problem here though as perfect conjurs up an idea of no flaws, no opposites, no down sides. But this never changing state would soon become stagnant, and self realization isn't stagnant. So what happens? There is no norm, but at first there is the all important realization of what we are, what we truely are. This can be expressed as 'I am awareness' and not the human that appears in awareness. We can shorten it to I am THAT and not this. As the realization evolves this statement remains true but is seen to be dualistic i.e. that and not this. The appearance of the world is a pattern of energy which erupts from the potential to the actual and is ultimately not different - not-dual. So what comes to be understood is that actually I am that and this. As Ramana Maharshi said "all there is, is consciousness". This equally could be stated as all there is, is awareness. The appearance in awareness is made of awareness also. Ultimately all there is, is this. So it would be equally valid to say I am this human as much as I am the awareness of the human - as long as all is included, non-dualistically.

Repeadedly ask the question 'who am I'? Watch the answers change. Many answers will be there but 'the' answer will not appear. You will not get 'the' answer. What may be noticed though, is that I am that which is witnessing the question and answers. I am THAT which witnesses, that which never appears in awareness.